The Martin Bunch

Life is Tough; It’s Tougher if You’re Stupid Pt. 5-8

FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift.

One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, “I’m almost out of typing paper. What do I do?”

“Just use copier machine paper,” the secretary told her.

With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five “blank” copies.

SIX
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in “Twister.” I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the “cruise control” and then went in the back to make a sandwich.

SEVEN
My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers.

One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question:

“I’ve got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?”

EIGHT
Police in Radnor, Pa. interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message “He’s lying” was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn’t telling the truth. Believing the “lie detector” was working, the suspect confessed.

NINE
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and it should be fine.

The mother says, “Okay, but, I just gave him some ant killer….. ”

Dispatcher: “Rush him in to emergency room!”

Life is Tough; It’s Tougher if You’re Stupid Pt. 1-4

ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald’s I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets.

“We don’t have half dozen nuggets,” said the teenager at the counter.

“You don’t?” I replied. “We only have six, nine, or twelve,” was the reply. “So I can’t order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?” “That’s right.” So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

TWO
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those “dividers” that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn’t get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the “divider”, looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.

Not finding the bar code she said to me, “Do you know how much this is?”

I said to her “I’ve changed my mind, I don’t think I’ll buy that today.”

She said “OK,” and I paid her for the things and left.

She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM “thingy.”

FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car.

“Do you need some help?” I asked.

She replied, “I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can’t get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?”

“Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?” I asked.

“No, just this remote thingy,” she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.

As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, “Why don’t you drive over there and check about the batteries. It’s a long walk.” (she had no clue either!)

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I’ll post the remaining four tomorrow.

New Photo Gallery

I installed a better piece of software to manage all of our photos. You can get to it by clicking on Photo Gallery over on the right. Also you will see a Huckabee Ranger thing at the top of the page. Please help me meet my goal of $100 by donating to Mike Huckabee. Thanks.

Iowa Caucuses

So I took part in one of the biggest and most important events yesterday. That is the Iowa Caucuses. This is the first of many to come but we are the first. I went to the Republican one even though I’m registered Independent. I had to register as a Republican to vote today but it was worth it. I threw my hat in the ring for Mike Huckabee. My top three choices were Mike Huckabee, John McCain, and Fred Thompson. In the end I decided to stick with Huckabee.

I also volunteered to represent Mike Huckabee as my district, Newton 3-2’s, first place choice on March 8, 2008. Other people from our district will present Mitt Romney as our second, and John McCain as our third, to the county. I am really wanting to see if I can get nominated to go to the Republican National Convention in September of 2008. That would be a dream come true.

I never was big into politics but for some reason ever since the Bush vs. Kerry election I have been somewhat into them. That and the whole caucus thing got me interested again this year. So that is why you see Mike Huckabee stuff on this site. I proudly am backing him and hope he wins it all. Let’s try and avoid putting someone like Hillary Clinton in office. We already went through her husband. Do you really want to put her in there now too? I sure don’t.

That’s another thing. I really don’t mind Barack Obama. He’s got a good record. He’s young and such and true while he may not have a long history or track record his ideas aren’t all that bad even if he is a liberal.

Anyways I was proud to say I voted in the Iowa Caucuses and look forward to the main election.

Below are current results taken from http://www.desmoinesregister.com/apps/pbcs.dll/section?Category=caucus. Not all counties have reported but the candidates have made the secessions and the winners have claimed their respective victories.